Mr P. Pilot: The Man With The Plan

The Patient remains at large but Mr P. Pilot has news - and it's fresh from the inner recesses of the clinically sane...

Interested parties may take comfort in knowing that in an attempt to return this blog to its former high standards of sobriety, good cheer and astute hedge fund-free analysis, I managed to persuade The Patient Wade to answer his phone yesterday. Upon hearing his voice, I feared the worst, for it sounded as if Jim the Jellyfish had got stuck in his throat, but, after some moments, the Patient did in fact talk to me about surfing.

I congratulated him on his recent piece on Chops Lascelles, and let him know that we had received many positive comments about it. My intention, in saying this, was to inspire him to pick up the pen again and get on with writing a new article for us. But the Patient's only reply was a mumbled groan about surf journalism being dead in the water. He said that everything has been done before, even the things that haven't been done at all, and started ranting about his next feature being about the surf potential on the Island of Doctor Moreau. As his editor, I had only one response to this, and it contained two words.

However, I would like to reassure regular readers of this formerly estimable surf blog that though Patient's mind is quite possibly twisted beyond repair, Get Carter does contain a surf scene (according to Wade, anyway), though it's a shame that the car park is being demolished, and also that a flicker of hope exists in Wade's insistence that though he may be on crutches, and though it is against the combined advice of the doctors of Newquay, Thurso and Patagonia, his (left) knee will be soon be good enough to surf on. Indeed, Patient Wade even laughingly said: "At least, Monsieur Pilot, I ain't missing any waves just now! Not even the combined might of The Gill, the Mackinnon and your own good self can convince me I've missed a single wave!"

And so, as the Patient could be heard eating yet another jellyfish, this has brought me to a decision which I hope Messrs Fonseca and Pangloss will accept. For the next couple of weeks I will scour these fair isles in search of surf, with the sole aim of taunting The Patient Wade. He's a competitive old bugger, in a Walter Mitty-esque kind of a way, and he won't be able to resist images of a few good waves. They might even restore his faith. So here, without further ado, is a fun little gem that Sam Smart and I came across. Enjoy, Patient Wade, enjoy!

Mr P Pilot

Comments

[BEEs]

BEEs